How an autism diagnosis spurred Giants player, brother to take a swing at a softball game
· Yahoo Sports
Stanley McClover Jr. had a dream for his son.
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A former defensive end for the Carolina Panthers, McGlover Jr. envisioned his son, Champ, following his footsteps in football.
When Champ turned 3, that all changed. He was diagnosed with autism.
“It broke me as a father,” McGlover told NJ.com. “And it broke me as a man. I didn’t know if I did something wrong.”
The anger, though, quickly dissipated and was replaced with motivation. McGlover and his brother — Giants linebacker Brian Burns — teamed together to use football as a vehicle to drive awareness and raise money for families living with autism. McClover and Burns will host a charity softball game on May 30 in Pomona, N.Y. to raise money for the Hype 4 Life Foundation, a non-profit focused on supporting the families of children with autism.
The first signs did not come from a doctor but from a mother’s intuition.
At 2, Champ was not talking and was not acknowledging when people spoke to him. One day, McClover’s mother, Angela Burns, suggested something might be wrong and recommended that Champ be seen by a doctor.
McGlover disagreed. Strongly.
“I kind of got angry,” McClover said. “I had resentment because I’m like, ‘What? There isn’t anything wrong with my son. .’”
McClover reluctantly took his son to the doctor for an evaluation. When Champ turned 3, he was officially tested for autism. When the results came back, McClover was floored.
“The doctor told me your son is on the autism spectrum,” McClover said. “He’ll never speak. He’d be nonverbal and you’ll probably be taking care of him for the rest of his life. His motor skills will be off and he will probably behave like a 2-year-old for a very long time.”
The diagnosis hit McClover hard.
“I didn’t know if God was punishing me,” he said. “I just didn’t know. I had all these dreams and hopes and aspirations for him as a football player, and God said, no, I have a different route for you.”
After learning of Champ’s diagnosis, McClover called his brother, and shared the news.
“I never heard of autism, and I didn’t really know what it was all about,” Burns recalled. “It touched us differently. I remember telling him, ‘All right, well, where do we go from here and what do we do next?’ I was trying to be productive and trying to keep my brother sane and let him know I support him, and I had his back through everything he’s going through.”
That question — “where do we go from here?” — would eventually become the foundation of something bigger. But first, McClover had to find his footing.
“It took me about five to six years to accept it, to really accept what was going on and not feel sorry for myself or cry about it, and get out here and learn and build up a village and start advocating,” McClover said.
One in 31 children have been diagnosed with autism and one in 45 adults have been diagnosed with the disorder, according to Autism Speaks. Autism can affect a person in different ways, including speech, communication and other behaviors. It can also impact the families caring for people diagnosed with autism — from the time required to find care to the financial strain of medical bills and appointments.
Once McClover accepted the diagnosis , he and Burns got to work, creating the Hype 4 Life foundation. Their goal? To create a network where parents can support each other, especially fathers of children with autism. Burns said he aims to establish support groups where fathers can lean on one another and feel comfortable sharing what they are going through.
“By connecting them, we allow them to have a community — a village — where they can pick up the phone and call a brother or another man dealing with similar issues,” Burns said. “They might even call someone who has gone through it before and has the remedy for how to fix it. It is always good to have a village that can help you in a time of need. Seeing that bond and that brotherhood is special to me.”
“I want horse”
The foundation is hoping to raise $1 million to fund a variety of projects, including custom sensory rooms for families affected by autism and GPS systems for families whose children “elope,” or find ways to leave their home unsupervised. Among the most ambitious plans is a Hype 4 Life ranch, providing water safety programs to help prevent drowning as well as equine therapy. Current plans call for an initial ranch in the Atlanta area, with a potential second location in the New York and New Jersey area if the first proves successful.
The idea grew from a moment McClover will never forget.
“I never had a horse before and had never been on a ranch,” McClover said. “But I have prayed all the time to hear my son talk and connect with him — just as a father wanting to hear his son talk and know how he was doing.”
McClover decided to purchase a Clydesdale. While waiting for the horse to arrive in wAtlanta, Champ spotted the horse’s food. It was a random trigger, something common in children with autism.
“He had a complete meltdown,” McClover said. “He was crying and crying and crying. When I got ready to take him out of the truck, he jumped on top of the horse food. I asked Champ what was wrong, and he said ‘horse’ for the first time. Then he said, ‘I want horse.’
“I just burst out in tears.”
“My mom was there to experience it,” McClover continued. “I told my brother, I told the internet. I told the world. I’ve been so fired up about finding out information on how to connect with my son and how to help other parents connect with their kids.”
For McClover, that single word — horse — was more than a breakthrough. It was proof that connection is possible and that other families deserve the same chance to find it.
The May 30 celebrity softball game is the foundation’s first major fundraising event, and it will feature current and former Giants players who wanted to support Burns and his family. Their participation means a great deal to Burns, both for the foundation’s mission and for the team chemistry it can build heading into the season.
“It’s going to be a great day for camaraderie,” Burns said. “For the guys to come back and make an appearance to support a bigger cause, it’s going to be killing two birds with one stone. I get to hang out with my new teammates. We get to build a strong bond with each other as well as support a big cause. Also, we get to interact with the fans and bring the community out there as well.”
For Burns and McClover, the game is just the beginning. The goal, they say, is to build something lasting — a village large enough to reach every family that needs it.
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